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1 Ally Dale - aka Jorge Campos.Ally is blessed with the gift of goalkeeping but despite this talent he is not at home there and still believes that his position is striker.Well everyone has a dream!! 2 Philip Craig - aka The Chancellor.This tight arse thrives on collecting the club dues from his players.He is a ruthless character and this helps as he doubles up as a right back on match days. 3 Peter Houston - aka Rainman.He's an axcellent driver and he also likes a fact or two. 4 Damian Wilson - aka The Fat Controller.Damian always gets the job done but should seriously consider cutting down on the pies.He's not the only one. 5 John Campbell - aka Rob Andrews.John is the skipper and so he takes an awful amount of abuse from the others including myself.John can pop up with a field goal from any dead ball situation but sadly that's the wrong sport 6 Glynn Miskimmons - aka Pel.Pel is the most stylish person at the club or so he's says.Likes his designer gear and would be partial to a few pints 7 Davy Mc Cann - aka 8ACE.Always looks as rough as a badgers arse on a Saturday but also always plays a stormer.Likes his pints. 8 Philip Cochrane - aka Killer.Phil has the uncanny knack of having no respect for his body or anyone elses for that matter.He would tackle his granny if she was playing for the other team. 9 Stevie Patton - aka Scoop.Stevie is the local reporter and our left winger. Gets motivated by listening to his personal stereo but to what music no-one knows.My guess is that it is satanic chants but hey I might be wrong. 10 Mark Gallagher - aka Big Foot.When Gally was born he was blessed with shear talent but for all this good there has to be bad and he was also lumbered with size 14 feet and an ability to drink all night.Well nobody is perfect. 11 Riki Mc Anearney - aka Mr. Villa.Another genius but this does not give him the right to support Aston Villa.When Villa lose the whole team are in for torrents of abuse from the big man. 12 Jim Lockhart - aka The Grim Reaper.When you see Jim approaching on team selections it is time to run as he is the man lumbered with the unenviable task of telling the players who are dropped they are not playing. 13 (no 13 as it is unlucky or so it seems) 14 Greg Craig - aka Norman Bates (Physco) or Lazarus.Has been known to burst a blood vessel if he doesn't get his own way also can arise from injuries that he made look spectecular when they go unnoticed by the referee. 15 Barrie Jordan - aka The Judge.So called because I am always on the bench. 16 Johnny Breen - aka JB.Johnny has one of the hardest shots at the club and he can also throw in the odd x-rated tackle. 17 Paul Dunlop - aka Lean back and aim for the sky.Dunny has the record of never having scored for the club and also never looking like scoring for the club.All his shots go high or wide it is the traditional way he hits them and so that's the way it will stay. 18 Simon Mc Neill - aka (_'_), (_*_) 19 Philip Grant - aka Flip.Philip is another ever present and has the knack of making me look incredibly stupid every time I play against him but I suppose that applies to everybody. 20 Nigel Quinn - aka The Chosen One.Nigel is the only player who disagrees with our sponsor the Jockey Club being on the shirts and therefore covers it up.A bunch of religious arse mate. 21 Clive Kerrigan - aka Kluivert.Clive is the main man as far as I'm concerned he gives his all for the club and is as hard as nails. 22 Willie Donnelly - aka Bert.Bert is the top goal scorer for the club and his record more than speaks for itself. 23 Michael Glendenning - aka Mitch.Mitch was our goalie until he left for England.He is well known for his house parties and for hid love of smut. 24 Davy Shannon - aka POP.Davy is another sound bloke who just trains and trains but seems to get nowhere has a knack of scoring loads of goals in training though. 25 Timmy Archer - aka Lombardo,Texas,Baldy One,Robot the list could go on forever.Timmy is the only living evidence of Roswell and that's why he ended up here. 26 Lee Mc Grath - Has a reputation of being a bit of a ladies man. Skillful player and part of the new set-up. 27 Geordie Kidd - Back to thistle after a long lay of due to injury. Geordie is an excellent player and is just what the seconds needed. 28 Gary Burns - Gary is back at thistle after a short period of football elsewhere he is an absolute rock in defence and can supply a mighty ball.